Monday, September 23, 2013

Port of Potty...literally

 This 1995 Ford Ranger bombing through Kodiak "Y" was putting the Portable in Port-o-Potty.
I busted a U-turn and followed this vehicle a way but never got a great picture.  Yes, it is a port-o-john and yes, it is on its side. I was hoping for some biffy juice leaving a blue waterfall on the tailgate but life is never that perfect!  I called off pursuit when the the Ranger went through the stoplight and made the probable crystal clear...final destination:  Bells Flats or Bust!

ain't really fazed, 'cause I pop much game
Rolled up tough, 'cause I got much fame
"How ya doin' baby, my name is Mixalot"
"Mixalot got a Benz boy, quit smokin' that rock"....Sir Mix-a-Lot, 1989 My Hooptie

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Crown Vic (she gotta pack much back)

This street submission from Sitka,a 1991 Ford LTD Crown Victoria looks like its trunk hauled more than luggage. The beauty of this full size sedan was not lost on the 90s era Irish mob in Boston for obvious reasons...trunk capacity.  Its locking mechanism simply didn't cut the mustard however as evidenced by this ride, and in the end, irony prevailed, and its only popular use was as a cop cruiser. 

Even legions of duct tape eventually fail and you gotta tie her down with some rope.

"...Four door nightmare, trunks locks' stuck,  
Big dice on the mirror, grill like a truck
Lifters tickin', accelerator's stickin'
Somethin' on my left front wheel keeps clickin'....Sir Mix-a-Lot, 1989, My Hooptie

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Honda "Leaf"


 The Autumnal equinox is upon us and coming this fall to a theater near you...the Honda "Leaf"...not to be confused with the Nissan electric car.  The owner brazenly encrusted this 1994 Honda Civic with an artistry consisting of nothing but a two rattle cans and remnants of her lawn cleanup...instantly "falling" into the category of hooptie....Sitka style, hippy with a pop appeal.   Enjoy...Sir Mix-a-Lot would be disgusted.







Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Pulsar of the Planet...Enviro-Friendly

This street submission from Sitka displays some ingenuity and functionality.
A 1988 Nissan Pulsar NX with a bike rack????

It appears you slide your 2-wheeled ride into the wooden slot, lasso it up to the roof (notice the permanent tie downs up on top), tighten her down and you can be on your way. Now this is Sitka, where there is only 14 miles of road, so you could bike almost anywhere faster than the time it takes to set up this Rube Goldberg....but I do understand you don't always want to don the Grundens to bike a 1/2 mile.

"Runnin' outta gas, stuck in traffic
Far left lane, throwin' up much static
Input, output, carbeurator fulla soot
"Whatcha want me to do Mix?"
Push freak, push"....My Hooptie, Sir-Mix-a-Lot 1989.


Editors note: This car was being manufactured the year that Mix wrote this song!

Monday, September 2, 2013

Tailgatin' Spawl-Mart style





This 1996 Toyota Tacoma with some "merely cosmetic blemishes" was spotted in Kodiak Walmart parking lot. What appeared to be a trick louvered rear window was actually duct tape.  If there is one parking lot in K-town with a potential for tailgating its probably this one. Perhaps if I showed up to Black Friday or even "Brown Saturday" on time I could do a little tailgating....why not.

1st Disclaimer:  I would under no circumstances unleash this strap and drop the tailgate on this 4x4 rice burner because one would most certainly observe Shia LaBeouf and this badboy would perform a "one-way transformation" a la Megatron at the end of every Transformers movie.

2nd Disclaimer: If in fact unleashing the tailgate improved chances of Megan Fox's arrival, then disregard 1st Disclaimer.

"Rollin' in Tacoma, I could get burned
(Sound of automatic gunfire) Betta make a u-turn
Spotted this freak with immense posterior
Tryin' to roll smooth through the Hilltop area.."    Sir Mix-a-Lot, 1989 My Hooptie