Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Street submission: Zombie F-250 "the Undead"

Just in time for Halloween, this 1995 Ford F-250 "Zombie" Edition is the ultimate antithesis of the "Eddie Bauer" Edition....and no the F-250 never existed as an Eddie Bauer edition (only the F-150). It has however been the King Ranch, Platinum, Outlaw, Amarillo, Cabela's, and Harley Davidson....none of which compare to the raw form of truck, untainted by such creature comforts as windows, doors, roofs, and a rear view mirror. Advantages: no deicing necessary on those chilly mornings; strap on some Scott ski goggles and mash the pedal.

The bench seat, steering wheel, shifter (no knob) and hood all appear 9th generation F-250 but the grill is definitively 10th generation Ford (97-03).  Surprisingly, the hard lines of the 95 hood match quite nicely with the more futuristic grill.  Some expanded metal and a square of CDX appear to shore everything up in the "under" the hood.

While advertised as the Zombie edition it is decidedly not the best option for combat against the aforementioned Zombies:

Reason #1) The lack of protective metal and glass will increase the odds of getting splattered in the mouth or eyes which invariably leads to Zombie infection and  ultimately the inability to operate a motor vehicle.

Reason #2) In the event of a Zombie apocalypse the choice of vehicle is limitless because most trucks/cars are abandoned and available for immediate use.  I for one, would choose a Toyota FJ cruiser due to its "horrible driver visibility"...aka Zombie safety and the handy suicides doors which seem like they would be great for picking up your friend in danger without actually stopping.

However, Zombie F-250 is the perfect moniker because this ride is literally "Undead"





"..Ooooh, I got dissed. But it ain't no thing
Runnin' that game with the home made slang
Baby got ished, Bremelo gip.
Keep laughin' at the car and you might get clipped
....By a hooptie"....Sir Mix-a-Lot, 1989







Friday, October 4, 2013

Corvette Summer: Los Anchorage street submission

In 1976 Brock Yates (long time editor of Car and Driver and the type of badass that would make the Dos Equis gentleman a bit envious) drove a brand new Chevrolet Corvette the entirety of the Alcan highway to test its mettle. Thousands of miles later, driving over mud, rocks, and gravel, mostly in 3rd gear, Yates walked away impressed with the true American sports car....true dat.

I cannot in good faith call this beautiful 1977 Chevy Corvette a hooptie, but my first female street submitter in Anchorage was terribly impressed with the luggage rack and I am too!



Wednesday, October 2, 2013

You better Checker self, fo' you wreck....


In a sleepy town that elected a cat as the mayor (the honorable Stubbs), one wouldn't be too surprised to see such a rarity as a 1969 Checker Aerobus 8-door station wagon.  This street submission from Talkeetna is the first commercially operated (or at least formally) hooptie to make the cut. The tinted windows are brought to you by Glad and the side mirrors look like they are ganked from a 83' Dodge Ram.

"Cops say the car smokes, but I won't listen
It's a six-nine deuce, so the hell with emissions..."  Sir Mix-a-Lot, 1989, My Hooptie